Today Nathan turned 4 weeks and wow have the last 4 weeks been insane. I'm not going to lie and say it has been easy because it hasn't. I have had to get used to less sleep, less independence, and raging hormones. In addition I have been recovering from a horrible delivery so it has been a rough ride. I think I have cried everyday so far at least once, but each day seems to get slightly better and when Nathan smiled for the first time a couple days ago it all of a sudden made all the stress and craziness seem worthwhile.
Nathan weighed 8 lbs 1 oz on Wednesday so he is gaining weight well. Considering I am exclusively breastfeeding this is very reassuring. The breastfeeding is difficult mainly because I am the only person who can do a feed so can't get any assistance from my husband. There have been moments where I wanted to throw in the towel and start formula, but something inside me has forced me to persist with the breastfeeding. Hopefully it will get easier as Nathan's tummy gets bigger. Currently Nathan is sleeping at most about 2.5 or 3 hour stretches throughout the night. This means I am up at least 3 times during the night and it's exhausting! I am going to set myself a goal of breastfeeding for 6 weeks and then see how we are going.
I have still been meeting up with my antenatal group and it has been great to be able to vent and speak about any issues we are having informally. All the new mum's seem to be struggling with one thing or another, and it's really comforting to know I'm not alone in trying to figure out this motherhood thing.